Recently, we were at an event in Washington, DC, and someone requested we do a "scene". Now, a scene can range from anywhere to highly sexual to BDSM exploration to other kinds of intimate interaction.
This person, whom we'll call A, was a little vague on what she wanted. She had seen us present two classes, one on Sacred Sexuality, another an introduction to BDSM, so we were not sure which way she wanted to approach this. As we started to negotiate (very important, creating a clear understanding of what we were all looking for and what limits we wanted in place), it simply wasn't becoming clear.
Sometimes the heart knows it has a need, but we can have difficulty expressing it, either from a lack of being taught it was ok to ask, from being uncertain/fearing rejection, or simply not having the language.
What she needed was intimacy. Being connected. Being touched. Being valued. Being accepted as a member of the human family, cherished by each other.
We ended up settling on a scene that was based on simple touch. Stroking, carressing, connecting touch. It was intimate, mildly erotic, and a wonderful opprotunity for her to practice receiving and for us to practice giving.
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