Unplanned Qadishtu Inspired Moments

One aspect of my Qadishtu path involves energy of a most special kind, the creation of rituals. My friends lovingly call me The Ritual Whore. Not only do I love to plan them, I love to attend and feel the energy of being in circle. I love creating rituals for my community. They are usually your Witchy, Pagan type rituals. As a Sacred Sexuality Priestess, I really enjoy the possibility of working with couples or an individual through sharing circle space in the most intimate way. Our work focuses on the union between the participants, deepening the soul, creating a link with the divine within, and establishing the connection from the Shadow to the inner self/being, exploring ceremonial magic and so much more.

Here is an experience I would like to share…

She was beautiful like a midsummer’s fae fluttering about The House of Pleasure and Pain. Let’s call her Fae. I was amazed that she and I knew some of the same people. We were attending a ceremony of a mutual friend. The ceremony joined the Master and Sub wedded bliss. The reception turned from Cakes and refreshments to “Hey, since we are here”. The Mistress of the house said “Sure”! It was a small trusted gathering of friends and each was prepared with their play bags. The Beautiful Fae caught the eye of one of our Pan-Pan men. I watched his attraction grow and swell through out the night as he found the opportunity to find ways to chat with her. I began to see visions of a late night tryst that was sure to happen. Pan whispered in my ear… My God, she is beautiful. I replied, I know! We all flirted shamelessly. Fae approached me with her beguiling eyes and her fluttery beauty. She kissed my face and hugged me a lot throughout our time at the house. I looked at our character Pan who was visibly panting for her totally kept his desire in check. He began his own negotiation with her and offered to tie her up so that she can feel the rope. She expressed certain boundaries to myself and Pan so immediately I offered advice on how to approach any fears she had. I negotiated with the Handsome J so that we could do a little rope work. Pan and I worked in tandem on our two victims I mean bottoms. It was a lovely psychic trip…the headspace was exactly what we all needed. After cooling down with J, I was able to talk to our little Fae. She was sitting there watching me in her corset rope, her flesh colored bra and rosy flushed cheeks. She said that she had much to learn from me and I was surprised at her open wide childlike eyes pleading with me to teach. I told her that I am available. As the night began to wind down at the house, Fae, Pan and I decided to go somewhere else. The energy of the night did not wane. Fae and Pan rode together and they obviously cooked up a plan!

I led them to a beautiful home with a balcony. Upon that balcony, the dance of ritual began to take shape. We sat upon the floorboards, looked out upon the city, and talked about our experiences. They shared an interest in knowing what I do as a Priestess. I looked them into their eyes because I knew this moment would come and I told them about my passion. The journey of exploring sensuality, pleasures through ritualistic acts. I told them that these rituals can be used for a variety of things and if they would like to share an experience, all they had to do was ask. I paused looking at them as they looked at each other…. they immediately said right now? I said sure. The Fae after answering was a bit nervous about what was to be expected of her. The three of us began to cuddle upon a blanket that was conveniently in Pan’s truck. Fae leaned up to me as I cradled her within my bosom, to ground out her fears of the unknown. Pan looked very sincere and lay down upon her belly and we shared a quiet moment. Then we discussed and agreed upon several aspects of the ritual. They were very eager to embark upon the journey. With a candle, a blanket, and our bodies, we discovered sensuality, pleasures, and connections of the most intimate. We spoke words of meaning and reflection. They both stretched their abilities and reached a depth of communication beyond words.

In this blog, I have purposefully left out the mechanics of the ritual because I don’t think it is necessarily important..for the event.. I wanted to focus upon a wonderful moment that was created in a safe environment between those who took time to explore a different side of life. It was indeed a great experience for all involved.

May the Blessings of the Goddess Inanna be with you always.

Namaste',

Gryn

Inanna's Embrace

Sometimes our job as Qadishti is to witness, to validate, to affirm another's sacred sexual experience. Xavier, a Qadishtu Blog reader, sent me the following description of just such an experience he had recently, and gave me permission to post here...so we might all bear witness to the power of Inanna, Goddess of Sacred Prostitutes...

Thought I'd share with you an experience I had yesterday. I was sitting in a pew at the liberal and welcoming church I attend, and the minister led us into a "pastoral prayer" that involved his speaking and then a moment for meditation. As he started speaking, I closed my eyes and relaxed. I invited Inanna to hear this prayer being spoken and to "come unto me." Within just a moment, I felt Her presence behind me. I could picture Her there, her robes white and hanging perfectly from Her shoulders. The gown, however, was open and the garment exposed Her breasts, between which my head was cradled. She reached around and placed Her hands gently on my forehead, massaging my brow. It was just exquisite. Such peace.

My shoulders loosened and relaxed as She embraced me. Her hands then moved down, over my shoulders, across my chest, and I shivered as my body reacted to Her loving touch. Then, without a word, I felt Her push through me and She began to place Her Holy Presence inside of me. That is, She moved forward through the pew and sat down inside me. She moved Her arms to mimic where mine were; She nestled Her long legs to conform with mine and She seemed to be amused as Her feet slipped into my shoes. For a moment there, W/we were together in the same space. I felt Her breasts on my chest, I felt the warmth of Her vulva as it meshed with my stiffening cock. There was a flash of pleasure, intense and gratifying, in my head and then she kind of melted into every cell and was gone. The minister said, "Blessed be," and I opened my eyes, astonished at what had just happened. I stood, then, and a bit wobbly, sang with the rest of the church these words that seemed to fit the experience so well (and made me wonder how they had been chosen):

Return again, return again, return to the home of your soul

Return again, return again, return to the home of your soul

Return to who you are. Return to what you are. Return to where you are. Born and reborn again.

Xavier

Under the Full Moon Light........

She moves gracefully upon the wind
She outshines the morning and the evening star
She calls me the Daughter of Making
She gives me the wisdom to listen
She takes me to the greatest heights of the world
She opens my heart and pours in Her love
She persuades me to accept all who seek…………….

I am a Spiritual Guide and Priestess who follows the call of the Goddess.
As a Her Priestess, I have been able to communicate Her ways to others
who seek. I answered Her call and posted to an invitation to the women in
my community. The idea was to have two rituals celebrate the full moon
and the dark moon. I create rituals to help others connect with the divinity.
The notice was a call out to those who felt a need to be surrounded by other
women and allow me to take them on a journey under the moonlight as
well as through total darkness.

A questionnaire was sent to each participant. It began with “Within
every woman, there lives a powerful force, filled with good instincts,
passionate creativity, and ageless knowing” We are the Maidens, the
Mothers, the Warrior Women, and the Crones. We are magickal, we are
the mysteries, we are the soul of the Earth, and we are Her Strength.
We are Goddess, Witches, Weavers…We are Women!’ I asked how they
would like to be addressed in circle, what is your sun sign, do you recognize a
patron Goddess, if so what is Her name, what element do you feel associated
with, and finally which Goddess phase are they in now. They indicated either
Maiden, Mother, Nymph, Temptress, Warrior Woman, or Crone. They were
asked to bring a candle that represented themselves and a Goddess
Representative (statue, flower, whatever they felt moved to bring).
And I asked the to complete an exercise and write down their maternal heritage
starting with I am so and so, daughter of…, granddaughter of... There were 34
participants who RSVP’ed with answers to my questions. I sent out a reminder
of what to bring as well as directions to a beautiful home nestled in the woods.

After a few days, the buzz of anticipation began to take root. The questions
about what to expect and what would we will do once we are together. I r
esponded that we would explore the mysteries......it could be your life as a Maiden
(which is a term used for anyone who is not married/ or married but without
children), Mother is anyone with children or who feels the resposibility as a Mother
in some fashion, Nymph/Temptress are really aspects of those who like to frolick in
the woods(figuratively and literally) flirty, self assured etc, The Warrior Women... is
a mother or someone of a certain age who is a protectress of her family and friends
and doesn't want to move into the Crone stage yet, and then there is the Crone...she
has embraced the wisdom of her life and gives it to others. I also told them we will
built the circle together...this will be more of an energy circle.....if that makes sense.
I will certainly explain it when we get there. Trust me. There is no prep work
needed just contemplation on your part...questions like why am I here, what do
I want to learn.


The day of the ritual arrived July 28, 2007 and I had a few lovely assistants
who helped me set up the house and the ritual space. Within the house, we
had fresh flowers, foodand wine. Outside, we created a ritual space. We had
two altars and torchesindicating the circle. Once the women began to arrive,
I wanted to be dialedinto each of their reactions and moods. I saw the delight
upon their face at seeing the ritual space and the house so close and inviting.
I asked eachof them to place their Goddess Representations and their candles
on the main altar. After placing the objects down, there were led into the house
where they were asked to wait patiently until all participants arrived. The last
carload arrived and the tally of women in attendance was 26.

I began the night with a small welcoming speech. I told the women present
that it is time to meet to the Goddess and commune with nature out in the
open and receive Her thoughts, blessing and gifts. I asked them be receptive
and allow themselves the opportunity to be guided into a space that honors
who they truly are. I gave them a sheet with a few chants like “We all come
from the Goddess”, “I am the Goddess” the Spiral Rhythm’s version, and “She
Changes Everything She touches” to sing to raise energy and prepare them
for their journey. I then asked them to follow me outside.

I asked three women to be the Maiden, Mother and Crone aspect to lay down
protections and blessings upon the circle and receive each woman as they
entered. The Crone gave them instructions to light their candle upon the
altar and then find a place around the circle to stand. Once everyone was
in the circle, I began the work to draw and cast the circle and place us all
between the worlds. We then honored the elements, the Goddess and the
God. Then all eyes were on me. I began to invoke the Goddess. I turned
to the women and now is the time to experience your true nature. You will
have a direct link to the Goddess. My voice was loud yet gentle and
commanding. I told them that I would lead them on a journey and I asked them
to be open and receptive once again. I asked them to turn a gaze upon the Moon.
There She is high in the dark sky. Her glowing faces looks down upon your
skin. See Her brilliance….Feel her caressing you as you raise your
hands to greet Her….. Can you hear her voice calling to you… Taste Her
energy and Now SPEAK her name…..The women spoke the name
of their Goddess. I then led the in a Drawing down the Moon within
Meditation and told them to speak to the Goddess. They begin
to sway and move in place. I walked behind each woman and spoke to them
and I said what they needed to hear. I remember words like let go, I hear
you, you are strong, you are beautiful….. and they spoke to the Goddess
through their tears and words of thanks. When I laid my hands upon their
backs, they began to speak loudly as if they felt Her touch.

When each women slowly stopped talking with the Goddess, it became quiet.
I could hear a few sobs then the women started to hug each other. They started to sing
“Circle around the fire” on their own. The song was just a perfect way to
send their requests out into the universe. The ritual continued with Cakes and wine.
As the wine goblet passed around the circle, each woman spoke of thanks to the
Goddess and the women gathered. They spoke of connections not normally made
amongst women and how the ritual had changed their lives. They spoke of love
and life as well as being in touch by the Goddess.

Once we finished the ritual, we returned to the home of J and I gave them each
a gift made by L. I commissioned earrings and bracelets made in representation
of their experience. They were put in bags that were colors of the elements. I
asked each woman to choose their gift. Once they opened the bag, I told them
that this is gift is a reminder of this experience. May you wear them and feel
the love of the Goddess and each woman here. May you begin a journey of
appreciation for yourself and others. May you always remember that you
are never alone and that She is always within you.

The ritual was crafted and designed to establish a connection with the Goddess. She
lead me to a vision of women who would embrace Her and realize that She is within
each of them. Showing someone the love, touch and embrace of the Goddess
is my greater work and I hope to have many opportunities to give of myself in this
way for all who seek Her within this body.


Some of the women wrote to me about their experience during the rituals. Here
are their own words.....

“......Then to reach out and feel Her presence above, below, and all around us.
To me it was like she sat me in Her lap and had a talk just with me even though
there were so many of us there. Everyone was talking to Her, either outloud or
to themselves, but you were so drawn to Her, that I couldn't hear anything but Her
and what She was saying to me. I felt Her all through my body and every woman
there, it was like we were all ONE. I drew Her into me. I drew everyone of those
beautiful women into me. Then we shared cakes and wine and went around and
took a moment to reflect and share”

“Finding the Goddess in the sky and reaching out to her....requesting, asking,
some of us (including me) begging for her to come to us....tears.....from within
and without.....and finally peace. Our gifts, L you're amazing, were our
reminder and our transport back into that time and place. Then the words from
each, our feelings, more tears....some walked to comfort and show love to their
sisters with the knowledge that the tears were now filled with joy. She took away
and gave us what we had asked for. We all knew it. She had given us another gift;
a gift of a new life, a new time, a new beginning. There were no longer strangers
only sisters, all were hugging each other, all declared love for each individual and
for the whole.”

“Gryn, I will repeat what I said last night. You have been my light, my beacon,
my lantern in the darkest of my days. I have longed for this since we first talked
about it right before Beltaine last year when you called me on the phone (the first
time we ever talked) while you were driving to Atlanta. (do you remember?) You
are my sister, my friend, my light.”

“I was sent up the road with firmness and a fierce seduction and confidence that's
(unknown to most) rare. I was walking on air. The power of that circle didnt have
nothing to do with the weather heat which I realised was actually chilly once I came
down. I was overflowing from every pore, power...mmmmm good. It was an addictive
exhuberance that I can get used to.”

Amazing and life changing experiences happens to those who seek the
Goddess. It was a beautiful night of memories I won't ever forget. The
Dark Moon ritual happened just a few weeks later and that was a totally
different experience. I hope to share it in the days to come......

Namaste'

Qadishtu Ritual - Embracing Life & Death

Embracing Life & Death

A ritual of rehumanization

8/15/06

Inara de Luna

Temple of the Red Lotus

He entered the Temple and was welcomed by a silent, beautiful and graceful priestess who directed him to deposit his personal belongings in a niche set aside for that purpose. She helped him undress and wrapped a robe around his shoulders. After sitting him on a couch, she then knelt before him and lovingly washed his feet with warm, scented water. He relaxed under her ministrations and allowed his mental processes to shift to a more meditative state. He inhaled the incense wafting through the room and felt himself begin to let go of the tension that had become a constant part of his life for the last week or so.

The priestess dried his feet with a soft towel and then held out her hand to help him stand. She indicated he should follow her, and she led him up the stairs to the altar room. She left him kneeling before the altar, with instructions to make his offering to the Goddess and to meditate on why he was here.

Unwrapping the bundle that he’d brought with him, he picked up and gently held the two specialty tea balls he had bought especially for this occasion. Cupping them in his hand, he raised them in front of his face and proffered them to the statue of Aphrodite, praying that she help him heal and thanking her for the forces of Eros and Love in his life. He placed the tea balls in the offering dish at Aphrodite’s feet and bowed his head in silent contemplation.

He wasn’t sure how long he would have to wait for the Goddess to appear in the form of the Priestess, and he wasn’t sure what he was expected to do. He knew that she was going to perform a re-humanization ritual of some sort with him, to cleanse him of the experience of the hunt he’d just returned from, but he had no idea what form this ritual would take. As he sat before the altar, he struggled to achieve a state of acceptance and wrestled with his feelings of impatience. He was unused to inactivity and uncertainty. In the field, even though he never knew what sorts of animals he would encounter, he always knew what was expected and he knew how to handle himself. There was always an element of danger and risk, but he maintained a large measure of control. Here he felt he had very little and had to trust in the process.

Finally, there was a movement behind the curtain that led to the inner sanctum. Someone was emerging, someone clothed all in black robes, completely concealing all features and body type. She entered the altar room and stood before him, with bowed head and slightly outstretched arms. As the figure inhaled deeply, her head and arms both raised and he could feel the Goddess descending into the body of her Priestess. And then she spoke:

“I am the Dark Face of the Goddess. I am She who rules over Death and Transformation.”

He bowed his head in supplication and acknowledgment. She continued:

“You have just emerged from your own place of Darkness. Will you offer me your story?”

He looked up at her and nodded. “Yes, Lady, I will.”

She nodded and brought her hands together in front of her body, palms up forming a cup, as if She would physically hold the story he shared. He began:

“I don’t normally hunt or have any desire to hunt, but my brother asked me if I would join him on this adventure with our father. It seemed like a great opportunity for a bonding experience with my brother and father and so I agreed. It wasn’t until later that I found out just what kind of hunt this would be……

As he finished his story, She closed her hands and bowed her head. Then she brought the palms of her hands to her chest and pressed them into her heart, as if absorbing the story into her being. “Thank you for sharing your story. I will cherish it.” She was silent for another couple moments and then began speaking again.

“Death is a natural part of life. Destruction is a necessary step on the cycle. Some people feel tainted by death. But death is sacred. As sacred as life. The balance must be maintained.

“By seeing death, you stand witness to that divine transformation. By inflicting death, you become my sacred instrument. You wear my face and perform one of my sacred duties.

“You have been transformed. I honor you as you must honor yourself for this sacred role you have played.

“But now, life calls to you once again. And you must value that life and embrace it with all the vigor and enthusiasm it demands.

“As the wheel turns, the cycle progresses, and I become, once again, the Maiden.” She removed her black garments and revealed the lithe body of a young woman. “Through me, you are healed and renewed.” She kneeled before him and spread her legs, framing her yoni with her hands.

“Come, embrace me! And partake of the joyous gifts of life and love that I offer you!”

She then led him to the sacred bower and lovingly sponge-bathed his entire body with warm rose-scented water. Once cleansed, she covered his body with warm kisses, her lips soft and inviting on his sensitive flesh. His lingam stirred and she took him in her mouth until he was fully erect. Then she took his hand and helped him to sit up, while she laid back and arranged her legs to either side of him. “Partake,” she whispered with a smile. He lowered his head to her yoni and began gently licking her lower lips, lapping at her moisture. He worshipped her until she cried out in bliss, then he raised himself up and entered her with a long thrust.

Enveloped by her body, he felt himself energized. His soul merged with his mind and his body, and as a more integrated being than he was when he entered the Temple, he repeatedly joined his flesh with hers. As their bodies rocked together, their energy fields merged and became one, and they became a perfectly balanced, unified whole.

He continued thrusting, while she lifted her hips to meet his thrusts. In his mind’s eye, visions of life, death and rebirth played out, over and over, in rapid sucession. He lowered his head to catch her mouth with his own, and let their tongues mimic the dance their lower bodies were enacting. The energy built and swirled around them until finally, he felt her begin to pulse around him. Her inner flesh spasmed and milked him until he couldn’t contain it any longer, and with a shout, he orgasmed. The boundaries of their skin ceased to exist for that moment; he couldn’t tell where he ended and she began; and his vision was filled with stars. All thought stopped and even physical sensation ceased for a terrifying moment. Had he just died? But then, the sound of her satisfied moans and slowing breathing filled his ears, he could feel his lingam still spasming, and her hands felt like silk on his back. The scent of their pleasure wafted up to his nose in a wave and he knew, without a doubt, that while a piece of him had died, it had been a transformation, and he was yet very much alive.

As the orgasm subsided, and he floated down to the bed, to rest with her head pillowed on his shoulder, he fancied he could hear every individual cricket outside, he could detect the beating wings of each bird, he could almost feel the beating hearts of all the people in the houses around him. He was filled with a sense of awe and an overwhelming feeling of compassion for all the creatures he could detect. And with that, he gave thanks to the God and Goddess for this gift of love, pleasure, ecstasy and connection.